Firstborn

Heya. I got this from Julie over at ‘Thinking about..‘ who was tagged by a friend to fill out a firstborn meme. Reading about her experience was interesting to me, as a mom, and I wanted to do it too, so I’m gonna.

Feel free to tag yourself in a similar manner if the spirit moves you.

1. WAS YOUR FIRST PREGNANCY PLANNED? Not even a little tiny bit. In fact, I was on day 17 or 18 of birth control pills at the time. You’re supposed to wait thirty days before using the pill as a contraceptive. I guess that part is sorta important.

2. WERE YOU MARRIED AT THE TIME? Not even a little tiny bit.

3. WHAT WERE YOUR REACTIONS? I had no earthly idea what I had gotten myself into. My reaction reflected that. Kind of like staring in a bemused and slightly troubled way at a charging rhino.

4. WAS ABORTION AN OPTION FOR YOU? Like… physically? morally? emotionally? It was an option, and my parents discussed it with me. At the time I thought my father was for, my mother against, but have learned since then that they are both excellent at hiding their agendas, because I had it switched around. I was fairly idealistic, and never truly considered it, but that was in part a side-effect of having no-earthly-idea-what-i-had-gotten-myself-into.

5. HOW OLD WERE YOU? Barely twenty.

6. HOW DID YOU FIND OUT? One of those little pregnancy sticks you get at the pharmacy.

7. WHO DID YOU TELL FIRST? My psychotic boyfriend.

8. DID YOU WANT TO FIND OUT THE SEX? Yup.

9. DUE DATE? November 28, 1997. That’s not when she arrived.

10. DID YOU HAVE MORNING SICKNESS? No. But I experienced a bone-deep exhaustion my first trimester that made even the cement floor of a grocery warehouse seem like an inviting place to lie down for a moment.

11. WHAT DID YOU CRAVE? Pepsi. The sugary-caffeine-laden kind.

12. WHO/WHAT IRRITATED YOU THE MOST? Well, I was kind of living Maslow’s hierarchy of need. I was working full time, going to school full time, and coming home to a boyfriend who went from emotionally to physically abusive upon learning of the pregnancy. My deepest desire was to sleep. I might not have survived the first trimester if my boss at Schoen Library hadn’t simply taken my hand during my work-study shift, and lead me to a couch in the meditation room where I slept seven hours straight the first time. Without saying a word to anyone, she showed me where I could go to rest, unmolested, and I used it several times after that. She also paid me for my shift that day.

13. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CHILD’S SEX? Girl

14. DID YOU WISH YOU HAD THE OPPOSITE SEX OF WHAT YOU WERE GETTING? No. Her dad wanted a boy, and could not mask his disappointment when we got a good look at her during the ultra-sound. But a huge smile broke out on my face when the ob-gyn said it was a girl. In fact, I remember her looking at me, feeling her eyes take in my b.f.’s disappointment and then light on my smile, and somehow she knew, looking at me, that it would somehow turn out okay. And I knew it would be okay, too.

15. HOW MANY POUNDS DID YOU GAIN THROUGHOUT THE PREGNANCY? More than strictly needed, ty.

16. DID YOU HAVE A BABY SHOWER? Not officially. I didn’t want one, could not face one. The visitors and gifts came in a steady stream, from as far as five hours away the day she was delivered.

17. WAS IT A SURPRISE OR DID YOU KNOW? I did not know at the time how much a shower is about the people giving it, and not the person receiving it. People need to celebrate life, welcome it, even if the circumstances seem scary or unfortunate.

18. DID YOU HAVE ANY COMPLICATIONS DURING YOUR PREGNANCY? Well, I was induced because I was 10 days late. They induced at 8 am, and contractions finally started in the afternoon. But I got a kind of medicine which was supposed to numb a certain area, and reacted to it so strongly, that it stopped the pregnancy and oxygen had to be administered. Scary half an hour. After that was a nice little break where nothing happened for a long, long time. Labor did not resume till late evening, and she was born in the early hours of the next day. Yep… a Tuesday.

19. WHERE DID YOU GIVE BIRTH? Pacific Communities Hospital, on the coast.

20. HOW MANY HOURS WERE YOU IN LABOR? 17 hours. But there was that break in the middle.

21. WHO DROVE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL? I can’t really remember.

22. WHO WATCHED YOU GIVE BIRTH? Her dad. He turned white and had to be administered to by a nurse.

23. WAS IT NATURAL OR C-SECTION? Natural

24. DID YOU TAKE MEDICINE TO EASE THE PAIN? Yeah. That didn’t go so well.

27. HOW MUCH DID YOUR CHILD WEIGH? 7lbs, 7oz.

28. WHEN WAS YOUR CHILD ACTUALLY BORN? December 9th, 1997.

29. WHAT DID YOU NAME HER? Suffice to say, both ‘Sushi Pancake’ and ‘Lazlo Fraggle’ got voted down at the family round table.

30. HOW OLD IS YOUR FIRST BORN TODAY? Eleven years old. And just how the hell did that happen? I don’t know.

The oldest trick in the book…

Memed. You heard me, Memed. Memed again. It’s been a long, long time since I’ve been memed, so long in fact, that I thought I’d somehow developed immunity. But it’s cool, cus it’s Norm over at ‘Costant Change is the Norm...’ who did the meming, and it’s one of the oldest, most venerable memes on the web: 7 random facts.

Here are the rules, such as they are: Players start with 7 random facts about themselves. Those who are tagged should post these rules and then post 7 random facts. Players should tag 7 other people and notify them they have been tagged.

(By the way: Norm only tagged two people, which I think is thoughtful, because memes spread kind of like viruses around the blogosphere, and it’s clear that he was using something of a quarantine tactic to prevent wide-spread panic and mayhem. I will not be so thoughtful, as widespread panic and mayhem rather appeal to me, as long as they aren’t a result of republican scheming.)

MY SEVEN RANDOM FACTS (pay attention, there will be a quiz)

1)  I do not care very much for shoe shopping. This is foremost in my mind, because yesterday, I did, I did indeed, I did indeed shoe-shop. The occasion: my cousin’s wedding, which is a week hence, and to which I’ve been invited. They did not explicitly state a dress code, but I gleaned through my fantabulous deductive reasoning skills that they would prefer people to wear clothes, and shoes, if at all possible. I guess I could have used this as another fact, but planning ahead isn’t my forte. Doh, there’s another one.

2)  I hate parrots.

3)  Hate is kind of a strong word, but when I hate something, I really hate it. I strongly, strongly dislike soap operas, c.d. wrappers, the 2nd to the left teller at Bank of America, and the way my crisper smells ever since Sierra dumped apple juice in there, and forgot to tell me. (Did you know apple-y stuff can create an absolutely horrid smell if it is allowed to grow old enough to smell that way?)  But I hate parrots. And I stand by that. I’m also none too fond of ring worm or explosive diarrhea. Just sayin’.

4)  I have never been married. Ever. But I’ve been engaged quite a lot. Four times, in fact. Twice was to the same person. In all honesty, I’m very happy about not marrying any of the people that I didn’t marry.

5)  My cat is sleeping on my bed. It is my cat, not the other cat which is not mine, but doesn’t make the distinction. This is a boring fact, but it is true, and it’s also true that the cat is sleeping there after being kicked out 4 times. How is that possible? Well, here’s the part I really wanted to tell you: Because my cat can open doors.

6)  I was born at… well, you don’t care about that. But here’s the fact: The building in which I was delivered is no longer used for the same purpose it was back in 1977. The building in which I first caterwauled my dismay to the big, bright world is now a mental health ward.

7)  When I was a baby- old enough to crawl, but not yet walking, my parents had some sort of party. That may be the most outrageous part of this story. What little I remember of the marriage of my biological parents is not conducive with loud, crowded parties. However, they had a party, and I was crawling around, and people were going in and out, and I was crawling around, and when someone opened the door I happened to curl my hand around the door frame, which no one noticed, and when the door shut, the heavy metal guard on the edge of the door sliced the end of my right, pointer finger off. People then noticed I was there, as I became rather loud and overwrought. I would love to know whose idea it was to find the tip of my finger, but apparently a whole gaggle of grownups spent the next 15 minutes on their hands and knees, searching for my finger-bit, while my mom tried to wrap me up and get me ready to go to the hospital. I’ll continue this story on #7.5.

7.5) They arrived at the hospital sans finger-bit. It was decided that since I was very upset about having a missing part, that the best course of action would be to take some more of me from my hip region, and stick it on the end of my finger. But first, I had to be calmed. The doctor gave me some sort of shot that was meant to sedate, but it had an opposite reaction, and according to my mom, some of the nurses were worried I would actually howl myself to death. Frankly, I think it was a reasonable response. If you have lost a nice bit of finger, and then had people decide that they’d also like to remove a nice bit of your hip, and if they then come at you and stick sharp objects in your person, I think howling is the very least of the responses you’ll be issuing.

Eventually they gassed me unconscious and went forward with the brilliant idea. The tip of my finger never fully healed, but I wasn’t aware it was abnormal till about the age of six. I thought everyone had a finger like that. The two inch train-track shaped scar on my hip, however, I’ve largely ignored. So my 7th fact?

I do not now, nor have I ever responded well to medication. So I pretty much only take it if I think I’m gonna die otherwise.

 

And that concludes my 7.5 random facts. I tag:

mercury, Jaynova, anhinga, ybonesy, Corina, Ombudsben & Bo. Also aefiel. Because you have invoked the inner muppet. Have fun!