Me So Cranky

It’s Sunday.

*pause for effect*

Here is where I ought to publish technicolor Western-themed photos and launch into exciting anecdotes about grizzly bats, however-

I woke. The problem is, I woke at 5:30am, and the waking was so jarring and unpleasant, I could have sworn it was a Tuesday.

My mouth, it seems, has been up to very bad things in my sleep. I think another damn tooth is trying to surface in a mouth where too many teeth have already made their sparkling debut. Either that or something crept into my slumbering yaw and stung bitter poisons into my right lower gum/cheek meeting place to make it swell up sorely-like. I’m slumping around this morning making noises closer to sasquatch than human.

This situation has been a cranky-maker.

One thing about my pretty awesome trip is: I hardly slept. I was sharing a room, and that’s not something I do. Plus, I sleep in a sub-level bedroom at home,  so I’m used to sepulchral temperatures and a sort of humid, coastal climate. Wyoming is arid. And those I had to cohabitate with seemed to believe arctic temperatures were not the proper thing for sleepy time.

So weird.

An adult can totally get by with little sleep for a while- once a person gets tired enough they’ll crash but proper, even in a baking desert of a rustic resort getaway. I had two sleep nights on the trip, and managed to usually black out by 4am on other mornings for a 2-3 hour nap.

But it is possible… not probable, mind you, but possible that the lack of sleep could have slightly tarnished my bubbly good nature.

In fact, my sugarbear-of-love actually accused me of being difficult this morning. This struck me as bitingly unfair- or unbitingly unfair, considering the state of my lower jaw. I contemplated the accusation in a thoughtful and reasonable manner, and then tortured him for 20 minutes over the comment.

Me? Difficult? 

Preposterous.

Anyway, like I mentioned, I’m home and cranky. Perhaps blimps and fanfare were too much to expect, but in the famous words of John T. Ijustmadehimup: “Where’s mah bitches?”

Someone should be hand-feeding me grapes and carrying me around on a rickshaw, dammit. I am crippled, wounded, and sorely lacking a clamoring throng. This world-weary adventurer has come home to the cold comforts of low resolution hentai and improperly frosted German Chocolate Cake.

Where’s the love?

Perhaps I will find it in the treasure chest at the dentist’s office, (if they still let 31 year olds pick out a toy for being ‘good’).

They freakin’ better have lollipops.

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11 thoughts on “Me So Cranky

  1. Eek – teeth?! I hope that problem is solved quickly at the dentist – with lollipops of course!!

    FWIW, I am almost *always* a crank pot when I return home a trip. This last one in July was classic – got into a big ol scream fest with oldest son over a party/bbq he threw while I was gone. He deserved some of it, yet, but there may have been a wee bit of over-reaction on my part as well. Maybe. Jury is still out on that ;-)

  2. The only ‘goodies’ at our dentists office are rings with plastic ‘birthstones’ in them. Sigh. I hope you get something better, and more importantly, I hope you get some good sleep now.

  3. tpgoddess- yay, company! There’s a displacement thing that happens coming home again, definitely. I look forward to it, and then it’s like… “well… here I am again.” Did your son save you any barbecue? A hungry jury’s worse than a hung jury.

    hi, hi Robin! No worries, I’m being a little melodramatic. Hope your week was a good one.

    J- That’s terrible. They should at least have a sticker option. *trying to imagine a plastic amber stone* ~shudder~

  4. Oh dear — coming home from an exhausting vacation is bad enough, without a dental emergency on top of everything else. I do hope that someone waits upon you properly today. It’s the least you deserve after your adventures.

  5. Even when you’re cranky you’re super funny. Hope the tooth doesn’t need a whatchmacallit, root canal. Regardless, ask for pain killers anyway. The stumblin’ kind.

  6. i’ll throw grapes at you, geographical limitations make a more comfortable option impossible im afraid…

    better practice my throwing arm i guess…

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