Season’s Greetings!


I hope you’re all having a bunch of fun. I assume I am at the moment, though I wrote this four days ahead of time, so there’s no way of knowing if the car broke down and we’re eating bark for breakfast, or if a virus broke out in my absence that lead to wide spread withering of the eyeballs.

Having withered eyeballs would likely suck a lot.

I miss my weeble wordsmiths… Actually, I don’t right now, I spent all afternoon trying to catch up with your insanely prolific blogging habits and I think my brain is bleeding. But this is the future, so it’s possible I’ve started to miss you once again.

Anyway. I was going to write sensitive, personal Christmas greetings, but I didn’t want to make anyone uncomfortable, and I also don’t know whose Jewish, whose Christian, whose atheist, and whose huddling on a window ledge in a reindeer pullover vowing to end it all if they hear one more trite Hallmark sentiment. So in the spirit of safety and inclusion, I will instead go for unobtrusively weird personal greetings.

barbara- Have a holly, jolly, winter solstice season.

Benji- May the meerkat of truth look down on you, and spare your sweaters.

bibliomom- I hope your holiday is filled with sparkly stuff that proves washable.

C.- Ses stanco? no? thought you would say that.  Be safe, happy and well.

David- May you find tidbits of happiness in the gold-toes of your favorite socks.

flannpakes- If life were a waffle… but it isn’t… but if it were… you’d be genuine Vermont maple syrup… except, you know, you’d still be able to talk, and I wouldn’t eat you… but still.

gingaTao!- Your blog was an early Christmas present. Gracias! So what will you give me for Valentine’s Day?

J- The book of life is long and gilt edged. I hope your journey lacks any semblance of a papercut.

Jaynova- For your present, I’m not going to make a Kucinich joke in this space.

Julian- You are the fizzy stuff that bubbles up in my nose when I laugh too hard while drinking coca-cola.

lilli- Artists and writers make the world go round. On behalf of the axis, I thank you.

Mad Haiku- Happy Holidays
………… see how the syllables fit?
…………….five, seven, five-

. *counts* Dammit.

Molo- It’s not mistletoe, it’s celery. Draw your own conclusions.

OnePoet- Be it ever so humble, there’s no place like Beth’s Doll Emporium.

QuoinMonkey- Buy a bigger stocking. I put in a good word with the big guy, (Elvis) on your behalf.

Robin- I hope your year is full of joy and cheer, and that you manage to resist the siren call of cat-blogging with noble valor.

Ron- Merry Tuesday. Go forth in the direction of my pygmy warrior.

Pamplemousse- I hope leisure and fun planned a successful ambush on your person.

P. Sunstone- May your reflective nature and a strategically placed mirror make the northern lights appear in the totally wrong hemisphere for one and one half hours.

Slothboy- May peace, joy and vintage Star Wars toys be with you this season.

Smiler- I adopted a koala in the name-a-marsupial registry in your honor. His name is Harpo Redboots.

T.I.V.- Tomorrow is the last day before another tomorrow. Oi! Celebrate!

ybonesy- Before I return home, I want you to paint a portrait of me that highlights my similarities to Marilyn Munroe. I don’t really expect you to do that, but have a happy holiday, anyway.


19 thoughts on “Season’s Greetings!

  1. *looks to his right at the shelving unit in his office that is full, top to bottom, with star wars toys*

    Ok, either I’m very transparent or you have a hidden camera in my office. What am I wearing right now?

  2. Having read Jaynova’s post, and agreed with it, I too will wish you a Happy Solstice!

    The one good thing about kittens is that they eventually grow up to become cats who are still cute, but not nearly as tempting towards cat-blogging as kittens.

    I hope your year is filled with joy and cheer, too. And at least a little touch of magic. :)

  3. yayay, have a merry sshhmass, full of small miracles of unexpected innocence and grand moments of inexplicable splendour, yayayayy

  4. Yay, Merry Merry, Happy Happy, Lovely all. No papercuts, but I did break a nail right below the finger line (does that make sense?) So I’m hanging onto that stupid nail, hoping it won’t come off and be raw and painful, knowing that it’s destiny somehow.

    Sigh. Merry Christmas to you, also, since Hanukkah is over. ;)

  5. Beth – Do you know Beth? I have admired her work for years. When the Tubes wrote the song “What do you want from life” and they wrote the songs last lyric “A babies arm holding an apple” it was a doll they had received from Beth as a tour gift that they were referring too.

    Thanks for the mention – and Happy whatever you call it…

  6. 1poet4man: I was a big Tubes fan years ago, and actually moved to California with a couple people who were huge Tubes fans. Their (only half-) joking reason for coming to California was to try and get into a Tubes stage production.

    I have that song on the live double album. I love the album’s intro, too: “Tied for the number one rock band in the world!”

    Does Beth have a blog?

    Darling, if you really care
    don’t touch me there …

  7. I use to watch the woman who sang those immortal lines shoot baskets in the Panhandle, near Golden Gate park and the Height-Ashbury…Her real name was Jan Dornakker…and she was wonderful…thanks for helping me remember her…she went down in a helicopter somewhere in NY…

    and Beth is too private to have a blog – she is old fashioned, but if you want her phone # it is 867-5309 – I forget the area code though…

  8. Well, her stage name was Re Styles. Jane Dornacker was Re Styles? I definitely know of Dornacker — she was a comedian who did the morning commute. She was so successful at it that she took a job doing the same thing in NY, and yes, it was big news out here when her traffic helicopter went down in the river by Manhattan, and she was killed.

    But as much as it was covered out here, I never heard mention that she had sung with the Tubes.

  9. ombudsben – I am not sure if she sang the song on the album but she did tour with The Tubes and she did co-write the song. Here is a link to more info about her…

    She had a band after The Tubes called Leila and The Snakes. Their regional hit was Rock and Roll Weirdos…and out of that group came Pearl Harbor and the Explosions whose big song was “Driving” and I am not a music historian, and in fact I have exhausted myself remembering these few scant details…


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